Week 15
December 16, 2017


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Stefon Diggs

Minnesota Vikings

Diggin' It and Thielen It

The Vikings have played five out of their last six games on the road. They return home this week to face a banged-up Bengals defense and Kyle Rudolph is out. Stefon Diggs has played in four home games this year. He has hit 27.7 and 40.3 on DK in two of them.

Fantasy Goo: Diggs has never played a game without Rudolph in the line-up, so we don’t really know how this will affect his targets. Cincinnati has been without both starting CB’s, but may get Dre Kirkpatrick back this week. I have Diggs as a WR2/Flex this week with Thielen being a solid WR1, must start.

12/15/17, 05:20 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Robert Woods

Los Angeles Rams

Back in Action

Seahawks Weeks 1-9 (With Kam Chancellor and Richard Sherman)
Passing success rate allowed: 2nd
Explosive pass rate allowed:19th
Weeks 11-14 (Without Kam Chancellor and Richard Sherman)
Passing success rate allowed: 22nd
Explosive pass rate allowed: 24th

Fantasy Goo: Robert Woods comes back this week, so I’m moving Watkins way down. Watkins production went up about 70% across the board with Woods out. Kupp’s production went up with Woods out as well, but even with Woods in the line-up he was second on the team in targets. Woods might need to knock some rust off after being out for three weeks so I have Woods and Kupp in the WR3/Flex range, and feel safe with starting either one.

12/15/17, 05:17 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Leonard Fournette

Jacksonville Jaguars

Jag's Starting JAG's

Jaguars RB Leonard Fournette missed his third straight day of practice today due to his quad injury. No practice all week.

Fantasy Goo: I expect Yeldon and Ivory to split the touches if Fournette doesn’t play, neither seems to be worth starting, but Houston has given up five rushing TD’s in the past three games (one to a QB).

12/15/17, 05:14 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Jordan Howard

Chicago Bears

Here Comes the BOOM!

Detroit is allowing 3.4 offensive touchdowns per game over the past five weeks, the most in the league, they have also allowed a rushing touchdown in eight straight games. Jordan Howard is tied for the most runs of 10 or more yards (30) on the season. Howard has had 12 100-yard rushing games in his first two seasons and he wasn’t even the starter the first four games last year.

Fantasy Goo: Howard is really boom-bust, he has yet to pair together fantasy RB1 weeks this year. He had a huge game last week and his match-up this week is just too sweet to think that he won’t be able to break this trend.

12/15/17, 05:12 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: www.rotoworld.com

Zach Ertz

Philadelphia Eagles

In the Clear

Zach Ertz has cleared the concussion protocol and will play this week.

He’s pretty much ranked as the number three TE across the industry, but I think he lacks the boom upside we might think he has against the Giants. His production with Foles, back in 2013, was only slightly lower than his production this year. In the first nine games the Giants gave up a TD to a TE in every game. In the last four games the Giants have only given up one, to Jason Witten, who has historically torched the Giants, it was his only catch of the game. They even managed to keep Kelce out of the end-zone, I believe a couple of OPI’s were involved there and Kelce did get 109 yards receiving though. I believe Ertz is a prime candidate for 5/50/1, but I don’t expect him to win you your week or be worth paying up for in DFS.

12/15/17, 05:11 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Nick Foles

Philadelphia Eagles

Not Skipping a Beat

Carson Wentz is out for the season, and maybe some of Next season with a torn ACL. Over their first 24 games Foles has more TD’s, fewer INT’s, and more yards that Wentz has in his first 24 games. Foles was a Pro Bowler who threw 27 TD & 2 INT with the Eagles in 2013. The last time Nick Foles faced the Raiders, he threw for 7 TDs.

Fantasy Goo: I’m not saying there won’t be an adjustment period and I’m not trying to say the Eagles are better-off without Wentz, but Foles is a very capable back-up and if he can stir-up that 2013 magic the Eagles should be fine. Normally I’d say wait a week before starting Foles or any of the skill position players on the Eagles, but with it being week 15 and the match-up being a weak Giants defense, I’m starting them all as you usually would.

12/13/17, 03:59 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Lamar Miller

Houston Texans

Miller a Solid Cash Play on DFS

Miller will face the 49'ers, who according to Football Outsiders ranks 30th in Defensive DVOA.

Fantasy Goo: In the last 3 weeks, Miller is 6th in total carries. In cash games, you want opportunity. Considering the 49'ers run one of the fastest paced offenses in the league, his carries, already in the top 10 in recent weeks, should see an increase.

12/10/17, 11:14 AM CST by PyromaniacMo

Source: www.footballoutsiders.com

Giovani Bernard

Cincinnati Bengals

Gio Free Square

Gio is gets the starting role today as there as Mixon is out.

Fantasy Goo: The man is only $3100 on Draft Kings. The Baengals are home and 6 point favorites. The game script could easily favor the ground game, which means Gio should get plenty of touches to surpass 3X value.

12/10/17, 10:57 AM CST by PyromaniacMo

Source: www.pyromaniac.com

Zach Ertz

Philadelphia Eagles

Still in Concussion Protocol

Eagles still want to look at TE Zach Ertz and his concussion on Sunday, but he is considered doubtful for game vs. Rams even though he is listed as questionable.

Fantasy Goo: Trey Burton has been a big name all week, going for 4 receptions for 42 yards after Ertz’s exit last week. Burton is a versatile athlete, but not a premier TE like Ertz. His good numbers came against Denver which is giving up the second most points to the TE position this year. Philly faces the Rams this week who are sixth best in fantasy points allowed. I'm not considering Burton a good stream this week.

12/10/17, 10:19 AM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Ameer Abdullah

Detroit Lions

Pain in the Neck

Detroit Lions RB Ameer Abdullah (neck, questionable) is not expected to play today, source said, though it's more for play than injury reasons. Detroit is trying other players to improve the run game.

Fantasy Goo: This isn’t surprising given Abdullah’s disappointing performances over the past year and more.
Tion Green led the team with 51 rushing yards in his debut last week, and figures to be the Lions' ball-carrier Sunday in Tampa. Pass-catcher Theo Riddick will see reps as well and I expect that he has a safer floor especially in PPR.

12/10/17, 10:05 AM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Chris Hogan

New England Patriots

Primed for Monday Return

Hogan has been out the past four weeks and has basically caused me a playoff berth in one of my dynasty leagues. If you’re still in it I’d get him into the line-up. With Gronk out Hogan should see a solid number of targets.

12/10/17, 10:03 AM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Amari Cooper

Oakland Raiders

It's A Trap

Source says, if Cooper can cut at full speed and start and stop in pregame workout, they will use him on a limited basis or “pitch count.” Calls it a “very dramatic turnaround” from what team was expecting 48 hours ago.

Fantasy Goo: Total decoy move, I’m not starting him even if he is healthy enough to play. Cooper went for 11/210/2 when he faced the Chiefs in Week 7, so it is tempting to put him in, but you’ve got to figure that the Raiders want him in there just so the Chiefs have to play coverage his way and leave Crabtree in single coverage.

12/10/17, 10:01 AM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Todd Gurley

Los Angeles Rams

Lower Expectations This Week

Todd Gurley has just 1 TD over his last four games, but still has finished as RB6, RB16, RB8, and RB7 in those games. The TD came in the RB16 week. Insane usage AND efficiency from Gurley.

Fantasy Goo: He’s been the most consistent RB1 for the entire season, which is a nice turn-around from a disappointing 2016. He faces the Eagles this week who are second-best in fantasy points allowed to the RB position this year. I think we have to start him, but expectations must be lowered. He’s a fade in DFS this week.

12/09/17, 12:58 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Josh Gordon

Cleveland Browns

Balls Flying Everywhere

Per @rotounderworld, 70% of DeShone Kizer's pass attempts have been catchable balls, the third-lowest rate among quarterbacks with at least 100 attempts this season. Winds expected near 20 mph in Cleveland this week.

Fantasy Goo: I would not consider starting Kizer at any point this year, but the key question here is will he be able to get the ball anywhere near Josh Gordon. He was only able to catch 4 of the 11 balls thrown in his direction last week, but he was going against one of the top corners in the league. He was still able to rack up 85 yards, and had over 200 air-yards, so we can be confident the opportunity will be there. If I had him anywhere I would most likely start him and will probably have him ranked as a mid-range WR2.

12/09/17, 12:53 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Andy Dalton

Cincinnati Bengals

Red Rocket Time

Andy Dalton’s finishes last 3 weeks: QB9, QB12, QB6. Over the last 3 wks he is QB 7.
This week he faces Chicago whose pass defense over the past 3 games is allowing a QBR of 103, a 68% completion percentage, and 6th highest passing percentage for 1st downs.

Fantasy Goo: Dalton is a viable streamer this week, but I hesitate to rank him in the top 12. If you’re in the playoffs you’re probably just riding with what got you there, but if you’re stuck with a questionable match-up Dalton is a solid option. Also consider that while Chicago’s defense has looked good most of the year, their best games have been at home, this game is in Cincinnati.

12/09/17, 12:50 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Tyrod Taylor

Buffalo Bills

Sore Knee Opens Door for Peterman

Nathan Peterman has taken all the first-team reps and it would be utterly shocking if he’s not the starter in a game the Bills must win if they hope to entertain any further thoughts about staying alive in the AFC wild-card playoff chase.

Fantasy Goo: This is a dream match-up, but I wouldn’t consider starting Peterman after his last performance (5 Int’s). If Taylor is able to start we should probably pump the breaks on him as well. The match-up is great, but his knee is the issue holding him back, if he loses his rushing numbers he loses his fantasy upside.

12/09/17, 12:45 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: www.democratandchronicle.com

Kenyan Drake

Miami Dolphins

Love the Drake

Per PFF, Percentage of Touches With At Least One Missed Tackle Forced:
Kenyan Drake: 25.7% (4th-best), Jay Ajayi: 15.7% (25th-of-50)

Fantasy Goo: Damien Williams is out so Drake should see 20+ touches, even in negative game-script he’ll get catches out of the backfield. When we are looking for a starting RB the first thing to look at is opportunity, and it’s definitely there this week.

12/07/17, 08:00 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Rex Burkhead

New England Patriots

The Belichick Shuffle

Rex Burkhead has scored a touchdown once every 13.2 touches. Alvin Kamara has scored a touchdown once every 13.3 touches.

Fantasy Goo: Burkhead has seen as many touches as Lewis over the past two weeks and is getting goal-line carries, against Miami this week I’ll consider them both RB2’s.

12/07/17, 07:55 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Devin Funchess

Carolina Panthers

Momentum vs Match-Up

Since Kelvin Benjamin was traded, Devin Funchess has averaged 18.4 PPR PPG. That would be good enough for the WR5 on the full season.

Fantasy Goo: Funchess will be facing Xavier Rhodes this week, Rhodes has been slowed by injuries over the past few weeks, but seems to be coming back to health. I’m certainly not considering him as a WR1 this week and if you’re in the playoffs you probably have other options, but if you don’t go with what got you there.

12/07/17, 07:52 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Mark Ingram

New Orleans Saints

Pair of Aces

The Panthers allowed more RB1 games in Week 13 (2) than they had the rest of the season combined (1).

Fantasy Goo: The Saints running game is for real, Kamara and Ingram are both must-starts. They could shred a middle-of-the-road run defense like Atlanta.

12/07/17, 07:21 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Alvin Kamara

New Orleans Saints

Pair of Aces

The Panthers allowed more RB1 games in Week 13 (2) than they had the rest of the season combined (1).

Fantasy Goo: The Saints running game is for real, Kamara and Ingram are both must-starts. They could shred a middle-of-the-road run defense like Atlanta.

12/07/17, 07:21 PM CST by Wheeler

Source: twitter.com

Bitchslap, Installment #1

Bitchslap, Installment #1

Posted by d-Rx on 10/06/12

by   The Archer


More Articals


bitchslap! 01/04 - by houdini






The Bitchslap is back for another year, and it only gets better this season.  For those of you who are not familiar with the Bitchslap, this is my opportunity to rail on the players that have ruined your fantasy season to this point.  This is a fun piece where I get to vent on these guys for failing you and hopefully give them the inspiration they need to right the ship going forward.  I will be breaking the season down into 4 quarters and delivering Bitchslaps every 4 weeks.  Each installment will only cover the previous 4 weeks of the season, so this installments lucky recipients have the opportunity to clear their name over the next 4 weeks, otherwise they will receive their 2nd Bitchslap in a row. 


aaron rodgers pyro character

Aaron Rodgers – Here is a name I definitely did not expect to see on the list.  What the Fuck is wrong with you Rodgers???  Did you know that you went 1st in a shit ton of fantasy leagues this year?  You are currently the 11th best quarterback in standard scoring leagues with a mere 68 points.  Your games against the Bears and Seattle left a lot to be desired as you threw for 442 yards and 1 TD total in both games…WTF!!!  I expect you to stay on track with your week 4 performance of 319 yards and 4 TD and not to see you here again, but you are here so get ready for my backhanded Pimp BITCHSLAP!!!



matthew stafford pyro character

Matthew Stafford – Stafford, you had a breakout season last year and have the best wide receiver in the game, and so far this season you are BLOWING ASS!!!  You are the 14th best quarterback with 61 points and have yet to throw for more than 1 TD in a game!!!  Not to mention the fact that you have more interceptions than TD passes, you are freaking killing me and other owners.  What is up with the dink and dump passes everywhere???  Did you see what Shaun Hill did when he came in for you and hit Calvin Johnson all over the field?  Time to step up your game and get your shit together, and for your ineptitude through the first 4 weeks I am giving you the double handed BITCHSLAP!!!



mike vick pyro character

Michael Vick – Vick liked being Bitchslapped so good last year that he is back for more.  Vick is such a disappointment and is driving his owners crazy with his knack for turning the ball over.  In just 4 games this season Vick has turned the ball over 11 times!!!  Are you fucking kidding me???  Vick you are a bum and not only are you turning the ball over like crazy, you are only completing 56.8% of passes and you have yet to run for more than 50 yards in a game.  Get your shit together and in the meantime enjoy your tasty BITCHSLAP!!!


philip rivers pyro character

Philip Rivers – How quick can you fall from the elite?  Let’s ask Philip Rivers who was the darling of Fantasy 2 years ago and got worse last season and is off to a horrible start to 2012.  Rivers you currently rank 20th amongst quarterbacks with a pathetic 50 points to your name.  You used to be the guy who was throwing for 300 yards almost every week and this season you have not managed to throw one 300 yard game and not only that, you have thrown for less than 231 yards 3 times!!!  You are a disgrace to Air Coryell, so this is going to be a bomb from back in the day and landing hard with your BITCHSLAP!!!


tony romo pyro character

Tony Romo – Tony Tony Tony, what can I say other than you totally SUCK BALLS!!!  You made all your owners feel really good about themselves after week 1, and then you have laid egg after egg after egg.  Do you realize over the past 3 games you have 2 TD passes and 7 INT!!!  You are the 23rd rated quarterback with a paltry 46 points!!!  It’s Big D in Dallas for DISGRACE!!!  You have some of the most talented skill players around you and still can’t put up any stats!!!  Jessica Simpson is coming back at 40 lbs heavier to deliver your BITCHSLAP!!!



lesean mccoy pyro character

LeSean McCoy – Another top notch first rounder that I did not expect to see on this list.  McCoy do you realize you are currently the 15th best running back and have 1 more point than Jackie Freaking Battle!!!  You currently have more fumbles (2) than TD (1)!!! You have been completely ineffective as a #1 RB in Fantasy through the first 4 weeks and you better get your shit straightened out, or you are going to singlehandedly bring down all the owners who put their faith in you to lead them to victory!!!  Get ready for a big motivational BITCHSLAP!!!



demarco murray pyro character

DeMarco Murray – DeMarco, you are currently looking like a 1 year wonder…wait I can’t say that because you did not even have a full year last season.  You were drafted very high this season and what have you done to pay back your owners???  You are the 20th best running back, congrats on being the lowest scoring RB2 in Fantasy!!!  You have been absolutely dazzling your last 3 games with 106 yards and 1 TD TOTAL!!!  You have got to be joking???  You are supposed to be Mr. Big Play and were going to take the Fantasy world by storm, but it looks like you have been downgraded to a drizzle!!!  I have watched your last 3 games and I noticed you can’t get away from a tackler so this should be real easy to hit you with this BITCHSLAP!!!


darren mcfadden pyro character

Darren McFadden – McFadden you were supposed to be the unstoppable force this season and you look like the undeniable farce so far!!!  You are the 22nd ranked running back just ahead of Cedric Benson, nice company you are keeping these days.  I hope you realize, because I sure have, that if you take away your 1 TD run of the year (which went for 64 yards) that you have 137 total yards on the season with a stellar 2.44 yards per carry!!!  You are supposed to be the Ultra Back, you look like an Ultra Crap I took this morning!!!  Your fantasy owners and I need you to step it up, so here is my legendary 2.4 yards per carry BITCHSLAP!!!


david wilson pyro character

David Wilson – Wilson you really made this easy on me with your first and nearly last carry of the season which you fumbled!!!  I am going to keep this short and sweet, like your career might be if you keep this up.  We pegged you as a guy to get in Fantasy this year and you FUCKED US!!!  Get ready because I have a feeling you might fumble when you get hit with this BITCHSLAP!!!


shonn greene pyro character

Shonn Greene – Shonn, my Iowa boy, you have really let me down this season.  I am keeping this one between you and me because I thought you were going to step up and own the backfield for the Jets, but boy was I wrong.  You gave me reason to believe in week 1 with 97 yards and then have SHIT the bed for the past 3 weeks!!!  On top of that it looks like you are going to lose a lot of carries to Bilel Powell, nice work!!!  You are ineffective in the redzone and well pretty much all over the field to this point.  I am pissed off and giving you a special delivery from Iowa City…yeah it’s a BITCHSLAP!!!


chris johnson pyro character

Chris Johnson – Well CJ.5K you did it again and fooled owners into spending a high draft pick on you.  It’s nice that you decided to play football again in week 4, but that does not excuse you from your first 3 weeks where you posted 45 total yards on 33 carries!!!  I just don’t understand how a guy who ran for 2,000 yards can look so bad when you are not that far removed from that season, but I guess you, along with Vick just loved getting your Bitchslap last season that you had to come back for more.  Good news for you, as I have 3 more of these lined up and ready for you, but let’s just get the first one out of the way with the over handed windmill BITCHSLAP!!!


julio jones pyro character

Julio Jones – Julio, I don’t think you have any idea how much we had been building you up going into this season and even had you as our second ranked WR to draft this year…WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!!!  You are the 17th best wide receiver so far this season and your last 3 games with 10 catches and 111 yards total is not getting it done!!!  I still believe in you and because of that I am giving you the biggest MOTIVATIONAL BITCHSLAP!!!


greg jennings pyro character

Greg Jennings – Jennings the best thing about you this season has been your Old Spice commercials.  You were another receiver that many pegged as their #1 receiver to draft and you have been one of the biggest busts so far this year.  You have perhaps the best quarterback in the game and are on a team that rarely runs the ball and you still can’t put up stats or stay healthy!!!  When you are healthy, which won’t be in week 5, you have managed 78 yards on 12 catches all season…THAT IS PATHETIC!!!  I have your place waiting for you in the next installment, but until then, I hope this one stings, enjoy your first of many… BITCHSLAP!!!


jordy nelson pyro character

Jordy Nelson – Might as well stay in Green Bay and talk to the 32nd ranked wide receiver.  So Jordy, Jennings is out and you are the main weapon and what have you done with it???  NOT FUCKING MUCH!!!  You had a breakout season last year and were supposed to carry that forward into this season but have failed to do so.  You had 15 TD last season and have managed only 1 in the first 4 weeks!!!  You came through with a nice game in week 4 and I expect that trend to continue and I don’t want to see you in my office again in 4 weeks.  So on your way out feast on this BITCHSLAP!!!


hakeem nicks pyro character

Hakeem Nicks – Nicks what’s new buddy?  How are you feeling?  Are you a little under the weather?  WHAT’S FUCKING NEW, YOU ARE HURT AGAIN!!!  You made all your owners feel great with 10 catches for 199 yards and TD in week 2 and then have failed to see the field the next 2 weeks and might not play this Sunday.  You are a total MINDFUCK to all your owners and have been that way for years now!!!  I am done talking about you and hope the injuries you have don’t get worse after this BITCHSLAP!!!


dez bryant pyro character

Dez Bryant – Bryant you did great in week 4 getting your first 100 yard receiving game of your career, but HOW IS THAT YOUR FIRST 100 YARD GAME!!!  You are a beast and should be a total weapon in the redzone for your team, but you have ZERO FREAKING TD THIS SEASON!!!  You have all the tools to be a dominating player in this league, but just have not realized it yet.  I am going to do you a favor and turn this one around on you by handing off the honor of this slap to your mother.   Mother knows best how give you your BITCHSLAP!!!



jeremy maclin pyro character

Jeremy Maclin – Maclin, I thought you were coming into camp totally healthy this season and you were going to take the league by storm this year…thanks for making me look stupid!!!  You made me feel great after week one where you had 100 yards and a TD and then came the rest of the season to this point.  You have managed only 2 catches for 30 FUCKING YARDS IN THE LAST 2 GAMES YOU PLAYED!!!  Not to mention that while you were healthy you were only targeted 3 times in week 4!!!  I traded a boatload to get you in one of my keeper leagues in the offseason and you have been TOTAL SHIT!!!  I hope this one finds you and wakes you up, so you get a backhanded, overhand with a twist BITCHSLAP!!!


robert meachem pyro character

Robert Meachem – Meachem I had you pegged as a sleeper breakout player this year and you made the fool of me…Now it’s my turn!!!  YOU SUCK SO MUCH ASS AND HAVE RUINED MY QB IN RIVERS, I HATE YOU…I DON’T WANT TO SPEAK TO YOU AGAIN UNTIL  4 WEEKS FROM NOW WHEN I GE THE CHANCE TO DO THIS AGAIN!!!  YOU GET THE, I SUCK SO BAD I GET ALL CAPS BITCHSLAP!!!


jason witten pyro character

Jason Witten – Nice Spleen you FUCKING BITCH!!!  You let everyone down for the first 3 weeks of the season and were so fucking bad that most of your owners BENCHED YOU LAST WEEK!!!  After benching you come out with 13 receptions for 112 yards and TD against the Bears…YOUR OWNERS FUCKING HATE YOU RIGHT NOW!!!  So which Witten is going to come out this week???  No way to know so in the meantime let me give this underperforming Spleen a hearty BITCHSLAP!!!    


jermichael finley pyro character

Jermichael Finley – Finley you are a specimen and should be impossible to defend with your size and speed…SO WHAT’S THE FUCKING PROBLEM???  You have failed to have a game with more than 60 yards!!!  Are you kidding me???  You also let your agent run his mouth and say that your quarterback is not a great leader…THAT SURE HELPED!!!  You need to screw your head on straight, learn how to hold onto easy passes and not fumble when Charles Tillman hits you…let’s see if you can hold on after this BITCHSLAP!!!


fred davis pyro character

Fred Davis – Davis, you broke out last year and things were looking even better for you with RGIII going off to start the season…so what’s your deal???  You have been completely ineffective for all but 1 week and STILL CAN’T FIND THE ENDZONE!!!  There are many who expected you to take the next step this year, like myself, so it is with great pain and a heavy hand that I give you this BITCHSLAP!!!


antonio gates pyro character

Antonio Gates – Antonio I am going to close out the first installments of Bitchslaps with you, as you may be one of the most deserving so far this year.  You are currently the 29th best Tight End in standard leagues…YES 29TH!!!  I can’t believe that you have been so bad this year, but then the stats don’t lie.  You have not more than 4 catches in a game and your yardage high for the season was a 59 yard game against the lowly Chiefs.  You are the prototype for all the other Tight Ends in the league, but you are not playing like it.  GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER!!!  For doing nothing so far you have a well earned and deserved BITCHSLAP!!!




BY HOUDINI (email me)